Pope Saint John Paul II on the Family

The Core Message of Familiaris Consortio
 
            Pope John Paul II offered his encouraging and nourishing exhortation to the Church in hope that all families during his papacy and those families of the future would hold fast to the beautiful and salvific witness that the sacrament of marriage is purposed to be for the world. He reminds us that “[s]pouses are [a] permanent reminder to the Church of what happened on the Cross; they are for one another and for the children witnesses to the salvation in which the sacrament makes them sharers.”(1)
In essence, marriage is a “memorial, actuation and prophecy.”(2)  Meaning, as a memorial, husband and wife, in the sacrament of marriage, have the honor and purpose of memorializing the magnificent labors of Christ by their daily humble and selfless sacrifice in caring for their offspring. As actuation, they are called to be exemplars of Christ’s love and forgiveness to one another and to their children throughout their entire lives. As prophecy, they have the honorable task of embodying and revealing, with reverence and commitment to one another and their offspring that Christ is the way, truth and light and through Him alone can one receive eternal communion with God. The core strength of the entire document rests in these truths.

In a very profound way, John Paul II reminds the faithful of the message brought forth by the Second Vatican Council Fathers. He reminds us that the laity are called to participate in the Church’s priestly (memorial), kingly (actuation), and prophetic (prophecy) mission and life.(3) There is a unique, insightful and exhortative echo of the message given by the Council Fathers in relation to the ministry of Jesus Christ.
 
Significant Themes
Each section of the document is filled with significant themes, but there are five key themes that deserve attention and are of great relevance in the world today and they are:

I   -  The Value of the Conjugal Life of Husband and Wife is Maintained even if their Marriage has been Imapacted by Physical Sterility
II  -  The Indissolubility of Marriage
III -  The Significance of Fatherhood and Motherhood
IV -  The Family is Called to Serve Life
V  -  The Sanctifying Role of the Family and the Essentiality of Family Prayer and the Sacraments

 
I. The Value of the Conjugal Life of Husband and Wife is maintained even if their Marriage has been Impacted by Physical Sterility
 
            Physical sterility is more common than society may think. If a catholic husband and wife encounter such a challenge in their marital life it is important that the Church faithful be encouraging and supportive. Thus, the faithful have been given the indispensable Grace and responsibility to fulfil their mission as priest, prophet and king. In a concrete example; if a married couple have been naturally attempting to conceive a child for a few years and have not acheived so, it would be convenient if there were some type of practical support from the parish they attend. A parish program, where a trained fertility professional in natural family planning was able to make themselves available to meet with couples would be a charitable and supportive act from the parish. This can be done either through appointment or a scheduled walk-in times during the week. If more catholic couples were aware of such a valuable resource and received genuine support from their fellow parishioners, there would be an effectual promotion of both the sanctity of the marital bond and the significances of the marital act and the dignity of human life. 
 
If catholic families were to be more mindful of the inherent value of their marriage, regardless of the degree of their fecundity, there is a significant possibility that catholic marriages would be strengthened morally and spiritually and less influenced by the secular world’s options such as artificial fertility methods. As John Paul II outlined, “[p]hysical sterility in fact can be for spouses the occasion for other important services to the life of the human person, for example, adoption, various forms of educational work, and assistance to other families and to poor or handicapped children.”(4)  Catholic marriages who discover this could be directed to a more meaningful, intimate and virtuous conjugal life.
 
II. Indissolubility of marriage
           
            Divorce is like a rampant disease and sadly much of society has embraced it as a norm. In effect, divorce has influenced the minds and hearts of many members of the Catholic Church. Within Familiaris Consortio, Pope John Paul II addresses the dilemma of divorce in one of his four general tasks for the family called: “forming a community of persons.” The relevance of divorce is an uncanny reality in many families that even the most devout catholics are not immune to. The matter of divorce is a great challenge for the Church. There exists among the laity a lack or total disregard for the truth of God’s plan for marriage as a life-long union between one man and one woman. When divorce occurs the peace and love of husband and wife diminishes. John Paul II stated, “selfishness, discord, tension and conflict violently attack and at times mortally wound its own communion… [However] at the same time, every family is called by the God of peace to have the joyous and renewing experience of ‘reconciliation,’ that is, communion reestablished, unity restored.”(5)
 
There would certainly be a greater impact if catholic husbands and wives were invited to partake in the mystagogia of the Church’s teaching on marriage as an indissoluble union, in light of the mystical union of Christ and the Church.  Furthermore, if parishes created more opportunities for couples to discover the beauty, truth and goodness of the marital act as it was purposed to be, then such an endeavor may safeguard the moral and spiritual lives of those engaged to be married and those who already are.
 
Married couples, especially newly-weds, should be encouraged through the good witness of their fellow married parishioners. Moreover, there is great need for catechesis that authentically proclaims the Church’s teachings on the significances of the marital act of spouses.  As such, those who are called to marriage ministry in their parish should be adequately formed so that they can, with genuine conviction, clearly reveal to others the moral teachings of the Church regarding human sexuality.

In addition, couples should be inspired to uncover for themselves the sacramental reality of the marital covenant. For example, those in marriage ministry could encourage other catholic couples to explore the greater meaning of the bodily union of spouses in relation to mystical union of the Holy Trinity and that of Christ and the Church.
 
Every parishioner should be given the opportunity to better fathom the sacramentality of marriage. How pleasing to God and what a great witness it would be if husbands and wives were to celebrate the union of their bodies with reverence, while revealing a glimpse of God’s love to one another and the world.
 
Families who authentically believe and witness their marriage as a communion of persons, share the living truth of Jesus Christ in their lives. Through their day-to-day sincere acts of Christ-centered love for one another they make possible the essence of authentic conjugal love to be witnessed by their offspring and the whole world.  Even those who have strayed from the Catholic Church or do not yet know Christ will able to see the profound light of their communion of love and life. In effect, those who witness the disposition of such joy-filled and abundant marriages may begin to gain interest in the Catholic Church and the moral and spiritual hope that they intrinsically long for. These persons become attracted to the beauty, truth and goodness of the sacrament of marriage and propel them to embrace more fully everyday of their lives the indissoluble union of God’s love for man.
 
III. The Significance of Fatherhood and Motherhood
 
            Pope John Paul II firmly stated, “the absence of a father causes psychological and moral imbalance and notable difficulties in family relationships, …” (6) Fatherhood is indeed a vital ministry to the integrity and growth of the family and its communion. There is an essentiality that fathers be intentional and unconditional in their acts of love towards their children daily. All fathers are called to be involved in the spiritual, emotional and physical development of the entire family. Furthermore, fathers must complement the significant role that the mother of his children has in nurturing and loving them at a young age. He does so by engaging them in the moral and doctrinal truths of the Church as their intellect develops with age.
 
If more catholic families were engaged in such an endeavor to uphold and proclaim the ministerial responsibilities of fatherhood, it would likely result in a substantial faith-filled growth of the entire family, as well as, create a stronger and more robust relationship between fathers and their child(ren). For instance, if a father did not spend quality time building his communion with each his children, there is a likelihood that those children will grow into adulthood believing there exists no significance in the vocation of fatherhood. When parishes promote the vocation of fatherhood regularly through programs and events, children will recognize more fully the inherent dignity that the father has in the role of the family.  His place is not simply to provide bread for the family to consume but to inspire his wife and children to consume the Bread of Everlasting Life in both their hearts and bodies. The Church needs eucharistic fathers who adore and love God. Fathers who embrace the sacraments, especially the regular reception of the Eucharist and Reconciliation are great witnesses to their family.
 
In an equally unique and complementary way, motherhood embraces the attributes of the Church. From the early days of her children’s infancy and throughout their adulthood her role is to remain vigilant in keeping wide the doors of her heart when her children need her. Even when they do not know or can accept it. She may have assisted or is currently assisting in providing financial stability to assist in meeting the needs of the family, such as providing food, clothing and shelter for the family, but her task of comforting the hearts of her family never ends. Even as her children beget their own children, her role is a spiritual one that promotes and extends peace and love. Her days as a nurturer of body and intellect may end, but her days in nurturing the spiritual life of her children continues throughout her life. Her devoted prayers and fasting are sweet sacrifices for God. The children born of her womb are enriched by her charity and with her husband they advocate a communion of love and life.
 
Fatherhood and motherhood are essential to the evangelization of the truth of Christ’s love for the world. Together they boast the everlasting mercy and love of the Triune God. As they strive to encourage their offspring to seek Christ in their lives and be Christ to others, they fulfill their vocation as parents as God has intended them to do. In a fuller sense, they promote life in this world and the world to come. The parish would do well to honor the vocation of fathers and mothers, not only during father's or mother's day but other days. Maybe, a marriage and family life ministry could develop and coordinate a simple yet profound tradition of recognizing the sacrifices and love of fathers and mothers. Once a month there could be a wall of recognition in the narthex or office of the parish for fathers and mothers in the parish. A short story of who they are and who their family is, as well as an example of their witness that the parish has seen in them. Once a month before or after mass the pastor or associate pastor could give this recognition in front of the congregation. Such and endeavor as this will surely make aware to the faithful the dignity of parenthood and the great value the Church has for their vocation of sacrificial love for their offspring and their spouses.
 
IV. The Family is Called to Serve Life

            The Church proclaimed, “the fundamental task of the family is to serve life…”(7) When one recalls how the family is called to serve life one also evokes the Church’s social and moral teaching regarding the illicit and reprehensible usage of methods such as; contraception, sterilization, artificial reproduction and the intrinsically evil acts of procured abortion.  Father, mother and children are called to protect and strengthen the dignity of human life and safeguard and proclaim the unitive and procreative significances of the conjugal act of spouses.
 
The natural institution of marriage plays an integral role in society. Husband and wife, as John Paul II declared, “are called upon to progress unceasingly in their moral life, with the support of a sincere and active desire to gain ever better knowledge of the values enshrined in and fostered by the law of God. They must also be supported by an upright and generous willingness to embody these values in their concrete decisions. They cannot however look on the law as merely an ideal to be achieved in the future: they must consider it as a command of Christ the Lord to overcome difficulties with constancy.”(8) 
 
As catholic parish families not only promote the service of life accordingly within its parish walls, there is an extraordinary mission to engage the secular world in genuine familial evangelism. Such evangelism is centered on marriage and family, and endeavors in a faithful and charitable way a promotion of the Church’s teaching on Natural Family Planning. There are many ways such evangelism can take place. For example parish families in their diocese or archdiocese can: (1) organize a marriage and family procession with the Blessed Sacrament leading the procession from one parish to another; (2) emphasizing the beauty, truth and goodness of the sacrament of marriage and the communion of the family, the community can advertise in places where favorite family pastimes take place such as; sports arenas, amusement parks, natural parks, museums, schools, restaurants, and more; and (3) with permission of certain businesses, parish families can hand out Holy Family prayer cards and information packets on natural family planning near or on the premises of businesses, particularly were contraceptives are sold.
 
There are numerous ways the family can live-out their mandate to encounter others through genuine familial evangelism. The challenge to pursue such an endeavor rests in the heart of every catholic family. As more families open their hearts and become believing families that serve life, the Church becomes an even brighter beacon of hope for society.
 
V. The Sanctifying Role of the Family and the Essentiality of Family Prayer and the Sacraments

            The believing family is also a family who embraces the sacraments and prays together. John Paul II proclaimed, “[f]amily prayer has for its very own object family life itself, which in all its varying circumstances is seen as a call from God and lived as a filial response to His call.”  Fathers and mothers, sisters and brothers are called to continuous openness to a communion of life and love with God and His Church. In a hectic world filled with busy families, working moms and dads, and children’s events, the world that surrounds the family is in great need of a reverence and peace that is centered on God. Some teenagers in the world may say, “I’m tired mom, dad. I think I’m going to hit the shower and go to bed.” The fairly rare devout family who adheres to God’s sanctifying role for them might say, “I know you had a long day son/daughter and that you are tired from all your activities; but how about we thank God for the day He has given us and pray for those in need?” When father and mother mutually exercise the royal priesthood of Christ as part of their parental ministry, they do so, effectively when they encourage their children to embrace a deeper relationship with God. 
 
Families can engage together in communion by praying the Holy Rosary and reflecting on the mysteries of the life of Christ. They can pray the Liturgy of the Hours and pray the morning, evening and night prayers with the entire Church. Families can share sacred scripture by reading together the readings of mass that day. Moreover, they can reflect with one another at the end of the day how the “Word” they read has touched them. Husbands can ask their wives to pray for a specific intention they have in their hearts, while wives can ask their husbands to pray for theirs. Children can pray for their parents during morning prayers and parents can pray for their children during night prayers. Father and mother can kiss and bless their children before they begin their day and can do so before they put their children to bed. Sincere familial prayer is constantly and charitably absorbed in each family member praying for one another throughout the day. Parents can exercise familial prayer by assigning a member of the family (extended family as well) to pray for them throughout the day or week.
 
Daily prayer unites the family to God. Each member of the family (father, mother, child) has the honorable role to encourage another member of the family to grow in their faith and life in God.  The sacraments of the Holy Eucharist and Reconciliation play an integral role in the spiritual life of the family. Fathers and mothers have the sacred duty to encourage their children to know and seek the sacraments as part of their growth towards holiness.
 
Celebrating the sacrament of Baptism, Confirmation and Marriage can bring about a spiritual wellspring of communion to all the members of the family. Families can not only celebrate marriage anniversaries but also Baptismal and Confirmation ones as well. How many Catholics celebrate the day they first received Holy Eucharist? During challenging times, when a family member is critically ill or has an ongoing illness, what better time is there than to embrace the sacrament of the Anointing of the Sick?  How about celebrating the ordination to the priesthood or the consecration to the religious life of a family member, extended family or friend of the family?
 
There are many ways the family can engage in their sanctifying role. The key is to pray with and for one another constantly and with faithful reverence to Christ. The center of all prayer is Love! Meaning, Christ’s love should permeate the lives of every member of the family. Families will do well to encourage one another towards the moral virtues of prudence, justice, fortitude and temperance. Reflecting on Christ’s Beatitudes, alongside with living authentically the Church’s corporal and spiritual works of mercy, is a great platform for the family to exercise selflessness that is centered on Christ. Moreover, they do well when they ask for forgiveness from one another when they have wronged another member of the family and to offer mercy when they are wronged. Such members of the family open their hearts and lives to the Holy Spirit and humble themselves in Christ so they can bear the fruits of charity, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, generosity, gentleness, faithfulness, modesty, self-control, and chastity.
 
As families live together in faith, hope and love with one another they become the hands and feet of Christ to the entire world. They joyously share in celebrating the sacraments, reading sacred scripture, learning the teachings of the church together, allowing themselves to be inspired by the lives of the saints and by working daily on becoming more like Christ and becoming more docile to the promptings of the Holy Spirit.  As families ask for the intercession of Mary the Mother of God and all the Angels and Saints, they join as One Body in Christ to pray for their familial needs and the needs of the families and individuals all around the world.
 
Conclusion

Pope John Paul II’s Apostolic Exhortation, Familiaris Consortio, is and always will be a treasure for the entire Church. The Pontiff’s insight and wisdom regarding the value of conjugal life of husband and wife is a much-needed truth to be revealed to the modern world. The Church’s time immemorial teaching on the indissolubility of marriage brings a ray of hope to a world afflicted with marital divorce.  His understanding and compassion for the significance of fatherhood and motherhood are an encouragement to all parents.  The Holy Father’s writings in Familiaris Consortio embolden and reassure that the family is purposed to truly serve life.  Pope John Paul II recognizes and proclaims that all members of the family are called to holiness and that through continuous and prayer as a family and adherence to the sacraments, a family can grow spiritually in communion and love. Christ thus sanctifies them and brings father, mother and child closer to His heart, while allowing His heart to permeate and touch those they encounter.

 

---

(1) John Paul II, Familiaris Consortio: On the Role of the Christian Family in the Modern World (Vatican City: Libreria Editrice Vaticana, November 22, 1981), n.13. [Henceforth: JPII, FC ].
(2) Ibid.
(3) JPII, FC , n.13. Pope John Paul II recalls an address regarding his thoughts on the eventful and salvific message that marriage portrays. Like every sacrament it is a “memorial, an actuation, and a prophecy.” He declared, “As a memorial, the sacrament gives them the grace and duty of commemorating the great works of God and of bearing witness to them before their children. As actuation, it gives them the grace and duty of putting into practice in the present, towards each other and their children, the demands of a love which forgives and redeems. As prophecy, it gives them the grace and duty of living and bearing witness to the hope of the future encounter with Christ.” [Cf. also; John Paul II, Address to the delegates of the Centre de Liaison des Equipes de Recherche (Nov. 3, 1979), 3: Insegnamenti II, 2 (1979), 1038.]
(4) JPII, FC, n.14.
(5) JPII, FC, n.21
(6) JPII, FC, n.25.
(7) JPII, FC, n.28.
(8) JPII, FC, n.34.
(9) JPII, FC, n.59.
(10) JPII, FC, n.62.